He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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