i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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