Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
