Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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