I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
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spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
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A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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