It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
