Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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