??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
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