I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Randomize
