Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
