Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
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