i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize