physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
Randomize
