how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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