is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
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i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Someone came in the potted fern
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
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