just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
