well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Dick very happy bro
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
