Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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