my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
