Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
