My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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