question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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