I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize