I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
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So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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