i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Randomize
