What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize