I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
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