when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
The ass gains better be worth it
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