his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
