Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
