Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
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Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
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I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel