craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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