Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
