That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
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