She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize