Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize