at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Mom said you looked used
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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