I hope mine doesn't look like that
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
