I feel like abortions should bother me more
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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