I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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