How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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