this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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