How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
