Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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