dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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