What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
