there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
