I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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