Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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