Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize