I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
