so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
